Day 82: What I want is the opposite of what I don’t want

A calendar and some nervous looking dudes

You may have noticed that as the days count down to 100, I am getting a little nervous. I am starting to think less about the number of days under my belt and more about the number of days left – 18. That is just about two and a half weeks. I remind myself I called this blog “100 days or more” to avoid this very feeling. Yet, I can’t help feeling pressure.

I’m starting to empathize with how agency contractors must feel as they near their 100 day mark. Now that I think about it, Tom used to spend the last stretch of his 100 days looking for a new contract. We all know that looking for a job is a full-time job, so the 100 day break is a bit of a myth. The break part actually works out to closer to 75 days.

Should I be starting to look for work? Should I be writing my business plan, putting together a portfolio, seeking investors? How can I do that when I haven’t even figured out what it is I want? I haven’t figured out how to be super mom. Damn, if I wait for answers to those riddles to shine down from the heavens, I should call this blog 100 years or more.

What do I know? I know what I don’t want. When you can take the time to look back at your job history, while not being in a job it’s easy to remember the bad times. It’s easier to envision the nightmares than the ultimate dream come true.

What I don’t want to be doing (in no specific order):

1. Sitting all day, especially in front of a computer
2. Working under someone that I’m not learning from
3. Living off of big evil companies profits (is this even possible?)
4. Wasting away in meetings where no one has anything to say
5. Working in an unsanitary, uncomfortable, or unsafe environment
6. Sacrificing my physical health (ie. eating, sleeping, etc.) for my job
7. Melody being away from her family for 9 hours a day

So the opposite of these things would be:

1. Sitting with my laptop in 2 hour increments three times a day
2. Working with a business partner who inspires me, or working freelance so I am not with any one team for too long
3. Working for/with non-profits, not-for-profits, startups, small businesses, or do good companies like Tom’s (shoes that is)
4. Running my own meetings and keeping them brief and/or excusing myself from meetings that aren’t on task
5. Working out of a space I control or a swanky office somewhere
6. Setting my own hours, or negotiating flex time via contract
7. Same as #6

I promised myself I wouldn’t take any paid work for 100 days, but I think I better start lining up some small projects for January. As long as they meet the requirements of the second list, I think it will get my juices flowing and allow me to set a course for the next 100 days.